South-Asian, queer and new to life in Toronto—it’s complicated

A man swipes his hand left over a photograph on a touchscreen, discarding a woman in the process. He’s white and isn’t “into mixed race girls” — although subsequently adds that he has slept with them before. The woman photographed is black, not of mixed heritage. When Channel 4’s provocatively-named Is Love Racist? The show aimed to prove that racism impacts dating in the UK, by debunking the widely held idea that a racial preference is equivalent to preferring brunettes or guys with back hair. By putting ten diverse volunteers through a series of “tests”, the show uncovered the participants’ racial biases, and in doing so raised a fair question: what’s it like to date in Britain when you don’t happen to be white? As a British-Indian woman, dating apps are a minefield.

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Request PDF | South Asian Women and Marriage: Experiences of a Cultural Script beliefs and values may be different within Asian and Canadian contexts. ‘We weren’t allowed to date’: Unpacking U.S. South Asian Courtship Narratives.

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The rest are arranged or semi-arranged by families. Generally, parents facilitate talks and perhaps even take decisions. This traditional system seems to work given that divorce rates in India are among the lowest in the world , albeit some argue it is problematic. But with the proliferation of dating apps and evolution of matrimonial websites, the concept of arranged marriage is changing.

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Two young South Asian scholars in Canada, who were raised in the Punjab region of India, are revealing how patriarchal South Asian codes of honour have impacted the lives of millions of women, including themselves. Sumeet Sekhon, from the University of B. In this guest post Sumeet and Navjot offer their own heart-rending stories about how they personally struggled because of the way male family members aggressively controlled who it was acceptable to marry or date.

Their research delves into how traditional shame-and-honour cultures can often lead to the devaluing of females in Punjabi society. Sumeet is a post-doctoral student studying caste, migration and gender studies at UBC Okanagan. Studies suggest a significant proportion of Indian-origin families in Canada are practising female feticide, sex-selective abortion.

A disproportionately higher number of male children were born to mothers of Indian origin in Canada, according to research published in the Canadian Medical Association Journal. This imbalance was starker for couples who already had two daughters. The findings stirred much debate and discussion in the Canadian media. Since Punjabis constitute a significant portion of Indian immigrants as well as foreign students in Canada , it is crucial to understand the manifestation of gender inequality that may cause this sex selection and prejudice against girl-children within the traditional patriarchal Punjabi culture.

This means refraining from doing anything that can disgrace the men of their family. Almost every aspect of Punjabi culture is rife with the notion of women being the bearers of the izzat of their fathers, brothers and all other male relatives.

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Two South Asian women recount how male ‘honour’ jolted their lives

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